In your imaginary award acceptance speech (yes, we know you have one), who’s the very last — and most important — person you thank?
Anyway, if I did have an awards speech prepared, the last person that I would thank is me. Sure, I’d thank other people. But, the one person who got out of bed everyday and didn’t quit trying was me.
I’d like to thank the academy for this fake imaginary award for something that I have no clue what it even is. I would also like to thank my father for never getting involved in my activities. I’d like to thank my mother for thinking that everything I did was going to get me injured. I’d like to thank my stepfather for shoving me around when he found out I was gay. I’d like to thank all of those kids who used to make fun of and bully me. I’d like to thank all of those friends who thought I was wasting my life for pursuing what I was interested in. But last of all, I’d like to thank me for not listening to them. Me who said fuck everybody and kiss my ass.