You just inherited a dilapidated, crumbling-down grand mansion in the countryside. Assuming money is no issue, what do you do with it?
Why, I live in it of course.
People have been murdered in it and it is haunted. There’s a dead body in the attic, but I haven’t found it yet. Maybe that’s why the place smells of decomp. There’s a chalk outline of a body in the kitchen. There’s some blood too. It looks like he got stabbed in the heart.
Outside in the garden, there is some yellow CAUTION: CRIME SCENE tape that is all tangled up in an old dead rose bush.
Part of the bannister on the stairs is busted. Like somebody fell through it. Maybe those are the screams that I hear at night. The person falling. And then THUD.
In the back there is a cemetery. The headstones look really old and some of them have portraits on them. Nobody looks happy. I wonder what they look like now.
Every night there is a free concert. Creepy organ music. I don’t know who’s playing it, but they’re really quite good.
None of my friends will come to visit. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s too far out of their way. My dad came to visit once. He’s been dead for over 30 years, so it was nice to see him again. He’s lost a little weight. Missing some flesh.
You should come visit. Just don’t tell anybody where you’re going. I don’t want CSI snooping around if you come up missing.